New begining, new home and new country. Well, new country for me. Back to the Old Country for Gary. We are so excited about these changes and as much as I have wanted to post here a commentary of the ways it all came about and the reasons and the process, I have hesitated again and again.
I started this blog mainly as a way to communicate with friends and to keep people updated on my life and my every earth-shattering thought. But unfortunately, as I have alluded to before, the blog has become a way for a couple of unwelcome visitors to track our lives in a way that feels like an invasion.
So it's time to stop giving that opportunity, particularly to Gary's ex-wife, Karen Siren. I'd like to close this blog-and this chapter of our lives-with a passage that Gary wrote that tells his story from his perspective and perhaps shows why this is more than just a situation of a nosy ex displaying curiosity.
Thank you to those of you who have been reading my site for the past couple of years. I have enjoyed keeping in touch with those of you I know from real life as well as "meeting" some of you through your comments.
Gary's story:
Hannah Siren is a little girl who is nine years old. I'm sure she has the same feelings as any other child does. I'm sure she has a hard time getting to sleep on Christmas Eve. Maybe she even likes to eat too much chocolate.
Does she like Turkish delight? What is her favorite topping on pizza? I even wonder if she likes to sit on her father's shoulders while he runs down the street?
That is the problem. She doesn't have a father. Well, she does but he is not allowed to be part of her life. Her Papa loves her very much. So much so that he feels anger every single day, for he is missing a big part of her life that he will never be able to get back.
In a court document, her mother stated that she had 'absolute proof' that Hannah's father was addicted to child pornography. He did everything to prove that he was far from the label of a pedophile. He took a psychological evaluation (at the mothers cost). He even demanded to take a polygraph and asked for his computer hard drive to be taken to an independent computer data specialist. Both options were declined. And maybe what might be considered most damning is that the 'absolute proof' was never produced. Eventually the father won his court-case as the judge saw through all the lies. The problem was that the judge could not prohibit the mother from instilling hate into the child -- from Hannah being taught to fear the father and want nothing to do with him.
To speak of such things is never easy. When one is labeled as a rapist, murderer or child molester it becomes tough to subscribe to the belief of 'innocent until proven guilty'. Life really doesn't work like that. If you knew the neighbor across the road from you had been up on rape charges you may always wonder about him, even if all charges were dropped. It is possible though that his ex-girlfriend wanted to get vengeance for some wrong (reasonable or not) she felt against her. Lying about him though may well have tarnished a 'good' man. It may have cost him his job, friends and happiness. And yet he still lives in the shadow of being what he never was.
This year Hannah will have her 10th Birthday. Her father won't be there. But he will raise a toast to her. For he loves her so very much.
'When your Tears come streaming down your face;
when you lose something you can't replace...'
